Tommi - timokivio.com

Addiction to approval

I wrote to you in 2015 that I was having issues in relationship, without being fully clear what it was and asking for quote for healing but in the end did not really feel the need, readiness or necessity for it. One year later, I got down to the issue: ”addiction to approval”. And by the time I realised what the topic was, I felt immediately that this was too big for me to deal with. Something knew it within me, also because it took a whole year just to get to clear on the topic! Jesus, you’d think it would take 1h of meditation and inquiry to find something like that. Then without nowhere, a though came up, very clear and strong, that this would be a case for Timo. Without knowing on a mental level what I was doing, I knew that this was the thing to do.

So, we went through the healing and after a week of absolute beauty, freedom and openness, I started again a heavy process of unleashing, just like 5 years before. At start I was wondering what went wrong, but now having gone through it, it was just another process to take the healing deeper: things that had been glued together due to that one belief, no longer could remain inside. And it was to my amazement, that it was not only bout things related to relationship, but this one poisonous belief had contaminated so many things that I thought to be cleared of since 2011. For the first time, I saw with clarity how poisonous beliefs can be. Few weeks after the healing I wrote you again saying that some specific things were remaining strong, but in the end these were just the unleashing of held emotions coming to the surface needing to be released. I went through a deep and dense period of emotional pain and solitude. At times it was so dense, that even people who loved me very dear like parents, seemed like they didnt want to spend time in my presence even when I was just silent, almost as if I was emitting poison around me and probably was.

2 weeks ago, on a saturday, I was in my kitchen cleaning and something switched. The feeling was similar to being in a room and hearing tinnitus that suddenly changes to some light chorus of humming. I could feel the flow of energy changing direction, and everything started opening. It has been 2 weeks now, and I havent felt such joy since 2012. Things will evolve and other painful periods may still come, but that is the nature of things.

I guess these few lines do not catch the real depth of the process, but at least it is my attempt to show you how much and deeply a single healing can affect a person.

Many thanks again and speak yo you again, when the time comes.